Tuesday, October 11, 2005

The Ganguly-Chappell fiasco & the court scene from Damini

I received this in a post from my friend Jignesh Shah. I don't necessarily agree with the final result but had to post it. It is simply hilarious.

[This is court scene from DAMINI

SUNNY DEOL ----- JAGMOHAN DALMIYA

DAMINI ----- SAURAV GANGULY

CHADDHA ------ GREG CHAPPEL

RISHI KAPOOR --- SACHIN TENDULKAR

DRIVER ----- LAKSHMAN

INSPECTOR ----- DRAVID]

Dalmiya: pehli tarikh me gaya ki ganguly chalak hai...strategy bana
sakta hai..captaincy kar sakta hai.

..aur ab mr chappel keh rahe hai ki ganguly paagal ho gaya
hai...

....agar to ganguly chalak hai to wo pagal nahi ho sakta

...aur agar wo pagal hai to wo chalak nahi ho sakta

... Isliye mai greg chappel se anurodh karunga ki pehle
theek theek bataye


... ki ganguly pagal hai ya chalak...taki mai apna defence
tayyar kar saku

Chappel: Mai pehle bhi keh chuka hun judge sahab ki ganguly gira hua
aadmi hai..

Dalmiya: Gire hue wo log hote hai jo apni country ki team chhodke dusri
team ko coaching dete hai..

Gire hue wo log hote hai jo ek acchi khasi team me
difference paida karte hai

Gire hue wo log hote hai jo team ke captain ko vice
captain se ladate hai..

Chappel: Judge sahab,Ganguly ke khilaf mai apne gawah pehle hi pesh kar
chuka hun..

Dalmiya: Aur mai unhi gawaho se kuch sawal puchne ki izazat chahunga...

[JUDGE GIVES PERMISSION.1st WITNESS IS LAKSHMAN]

Dalmiya: Haan to lakshman..ye batao team me koi groupism nahi hai...

lakshman: nahi nahi..hum log to saath saath khelte hai...

Dalmiya: matlab tum aur ganguly saath saath khelte ho...

lakshman: nahi..mai to hamesha dravid ki team me rehata .....

Dalmiya: par abhi to tum keh rahe the ki koi groupism nahi hai..

[LAKSHMAN LOOKS TOWARDS CHAPPEL.CHAPPEL IS VERY FURIOUS]

Dalmiya : Chappel sahab ..aap lakshman pe chhillana chahte honge...nahi
kuch badbad keh rahe the to mujhe laga..

Dalmiya: mere agle gawah hai rahul dravid..chappel sahab aap dhyan
dijiye...

Dalmiya: to ye batiye..jabganguly 262 ball me century banate hai to sab
slow khelne ka aarop lagate hai..

...aur jab aap 237 ball khelke 98 banate hai to team me
koi kuch nahi bolta...

Dravid: A...j....b....j

Dalmiya:A...j...b...j.. chappel sahab apko a...j...b...j ki bhasha aati
hai...khair aapko to pehle hi kuch sunai deta hai

....sach to yeh hai ki team ganguly ki captaincy se jalti
hai...log ganguly ko team se nikalwana chhte hai..

... aur ye sach sabit arne ke liye mai ganguly ke opening
partner sachin ko bulana chaunga

Dalmiya: Sachin..aap ganguly se bahut pyar karte hai

Sachin: [WITH SHYNESS]....Aaila...haa karta hu....bahut pyar karta hu

Dalmiya: Dekha judge sahab...sachin ganguly se pyar...mera malab hai
bahut pyar karta hai...ye aur baat hai ki wo ye baat


muskura ke bhi keh sakta tha

Haanto yeh batiye...usdin dressing room me jab ganguly aur
chappel ka jhagda chal rah tha...

Sachin: aaila..aisa kuch nahi hua tha

Dalmiya: iskamatlab ganguly jhuth bol raha hai..wo paagal hai use
paagalkhane bhej diya jaana chahiye

Sachin:aaila...maine aisa kab kaha

Dalmiya: nahi ,chappel sahab aap sahi the ..ganguly gira hua aadmi
hai...

Sachin: ae dalmiya....

Ganguly: dalmiyaji idhar aaiye...aapko koi hak nahi banta mere
pati...mera matlab hai partner.. se aise bat karne ka

Dalmiya:Tum apne aapko samajhte kya ho...team ke captain ho matlab mujhe
kharid liya..

Sachin: ae dalmiya...chal hata hata..

Dalmiya:[whistles]..dekha judge sahab ..in dono ki jodi me kitna pyar
hai...jo aise najuk mauke pe bhi ek dusre ka saath


de rahe hai

Chappel:Judge sahab..meri to samajh me nahi aa raha ye opening jodi ka
pyar dikhake saabit kya karna chahte hai..

Dalmiya:kuch nahi......sachin ..mai ye case chhod raha hoo..out of form
ganguly ko is samay mujhse jyada tumhari jaroorat hai

[CHAPPEL REALISES THAT HE MAY LOOSE THE CASE...]

Chappel:j udge sahab...abhi abhii ashes ki news mili...england ne
australia ko hara diya hai...mere sine me joro ka

heart attack aaya hai..court se gujarish hai ki wo agli
taarikh de de

dalmiya: tarikh pe tarikh pe tarikh...pehli tarikh pe kaha gaya ki
ganguly ka form temporay hai..aur dusri tarikh le li gayi

...dusri tarikh me kaha gaya ki ganguly paagal ho gaya hai
aur captaincy karne ke layak nahi hai..

... agli tarikh tak mai board president se hat jaunga...aur
uske bad ganguly pe match fixing ka aarop lag

jayega...is tarah to bas milti rahegi tarikh pe tarikh
pe tarikh...par kabhi Indian team world cup nahi jeet payegi..

...band kar dijiye aisi BCCI jo ek stable indian team bhi
nhi de sakte...

Judge: dono taraf ke jirah aur gawah ke bayano se ye saabit hota hai
ki ganguly begunah hai aur zim aur bangladesh ke


khilaf century banane ke baad unhone saabit kar diya hai
ki wo form me aa chuke hai.Chappel ne dada se


direct panga liya hai.. isliye unhe coach ke pad se
brkhast kiya jaata hai...

aaj se ye fisla ganguly ke faisle ke naam se jaana
jayega...